90 - Golden State Killer V3, Lecture notes of Law

Download 90 - Golden State Killer V3 and more Lecture notes Law in PDF only on Docsity! Cold Open: On Tuesday, April 24th, 2018, Joseph James DeAngelo, 72, in what Sacramento Sheriff Scott Jones called a "perfectly executed arrest," was taken into custody by local police and FBI agents when he stepped outside his Citrus Heights home, a quiet suburb of Sacramento. The man believed to be the East Area Rapist, also known as the Golden State Killer, the Visalia (“Vi-sail-ya) Ransacker, the Original Night Stalker and the Diamond Knot Killer had finally been captured, forty-four years after his crime spree began. He’d started ransacking over 100 Sacramento area homes in 1974. He’d progressed from burglary to rape by 1976, raping over 50 California women and girls. And he’s believed to have killed for the first time in 1975, killing 12 men and women by 1986.
 
 And then, after 13 years of home invasion, rape, and murder… the Golden State Killer, outside of a few possible harassing phone calls to victims years later, just seemingly vanished for 32 years. 
 
 And then less than two months ago, a 72 year old man living with his daughter and granddaughter who’d recently retired after working for 27 years at a Savemart supermarket distribution warehouse in Roseville was arrested after DNA matches him to the crime scenes. 
 
 And why did it take so many years to make that DNA match? Well, because Joseph was never on a short list of suspects. He was never on a long list of suspects. Police never came CLOSE to catching this sadistic piece of shit for decades. 
 
 And then he was arrested thanks to some very innovative detective work - investigators uploaded DNA taken from one of the crimes to GED match dot com. Never heard of that website? Me either. GED Match dot com is similar to Ancestry dot com and 23 and me, although much less widely known. With a service like 23andMe or AncestryDNA, you provide a saliva sample for DNA testing and then the results are only given to you and only you. The results are private. Those companies don’t share your data with anyone else - which limits the amount of family tree investigation you can do, because your DNA is only matched against other DNA in that one company’s particular genetic database. So, recently, companies like GED match dot com have popped up so you can continue your search. You can make those previously private ancestry dot com or 23 and me dot come results public and possibly reach more relatives. 
 
 What does that mean for law enforcement? It means they can compare crime scene DNA against your DNA and anyone else’s DNA that has been sent in to these sites and potentially find either the relative of a victim to assist them in body identification purposes, AND , they can run the DNA of whoever committed the crime through this public database in the hopes of either locating the suspect or the relative of a suspect, and then do some family tree detective work to find the actual suspect. Or, ideally, the suspect has done some family tree snooping themselves and the police can nail ‘em right away. 
 
 Yep - it just got that much harder to get away with murder! We’re entering a new era of criminal investigation. And this new avenue for tracking down suspects led to the apprehension of Joseph James DeAngelo. One of his relatives happened to upload their Ancestry dot com results to GED Match dot com, that DNA proved to be a familial match to the Golden State Killer’s DNA, and from there detectives realized that one relative, Richard, was in the right places at the right times to have committed all the crimes. Police then swabbed the driver's side handle of Joseph’s car to collect a DNA sample from him, according to arrest and search warrants released just this past Friday. Authorities sent it in for testing and matched it to semen recovered at some of the Golden State Killer's crime scenes. And then they showed up at his home and surprised the cold-blooded son of bitch and brought him in. Amazing, right? Well, now that you know how part of Richard’s story ends, let’s find out how it began and where it will likely go from here, and how this new DNA matching technology has led to more arrests and will most likely lead to many more on this “fuck that guy we’re so finally glad they got him and we hope he rots in prison”, Golden State Killer edition, of Timesuck. 
 
 PAUSE 
 TIMESUCK INTRO 
 I. Welcome: A. Happy Monday Timesuckers! You ready to learn some new shit? I hope so. I love how, even with a serial killer episode, we go after bonus peripheral knowledge - like how DNA investigative human being and very funny man. Glad I got to work with him. Got to hang with Jimmie Whisman from Small Town Murder. Lynze and I had a great time. 
 
 This weekend - more touring! Heading to our nation’s capitol! DC in D.C.! Flat Earth tour rolls into the DC Draft house June 8th and 9th. 
 
 June 15-16th More Flat Earth mockery at the Des Moines, Iowa, Funny Bone.
 
 July 12-14th - Orlando Improv. Live podcast on the 15th.
 
 Comedy Store in La Jolla, California July 20-22nd. 
 
 Dayton, Ohio Funnybone July 27-28th. 
 
 Many more tour dates at www.dancummins.tv. 
 F. And now, let’s head back to the unfortunately long life and horrible, disgusting times of the recently apprehended Golden State Killer. 
 PAUSE TIMESUCK INTERLUDE
 II. Intro A. Who is Joseph James DeAngelo? Who is Joseph James DeAngelo? The man who, while he hasn’t been convicted of being the Golden State Killer, is STRONGLY, STRONGLY, STRONGLY believed to be the killer. To the point his trial feels like a formality. He hasn’t entered a plea as of me completing this research - I’m sure we’re going to have a lot of updates in the future on this one - but, you don’t charge someone with 12 murders after all these years, and I’m sure a variety of new charges are on the way, unless you have a pretty good idea he’s the guy. |
 
 So, maybe not the guy, innocent until proven guilty, but, lot of evidence pointing to him being the guy. SO MUCH. Direct DNA match king of “so much.”
 
 Operating on the premiss that he is the guy, what do we know about him? Not a lot, unfortunately. 
 1. Age: We know he’s 72 now, which places his age at roughly 28 when the home ran sackings began, roughly 30 when the rapes began, and roughly 40 when the murders and rapes ended. 
 2. Citrus Heights: We know that where he was caught, Citrus Heights, is where four of his attacks took place. 
 3. Fired from police force: We know that in 1979, he was charged with shoplifting a can of dog repellant and a hammer from a suburban Sacramento Pay N' Save and that it cost him his job as a police officer in Auburn, CA. We know he worked as a police officer in Exeter and in Auburn between 1973 and 1979. 
 
 We know that in 1978, Michael Motherfucking McDonald sang lead vocals on the Doobie Brother’s number one Billboard Pop Singles chart hit, What a Fool Believes. “What a Fool Believes… he sees… No wise has the power….. to reason away…. what seems to be…. is always better than nothing… than nothing at all…” 
 
 Man it has been too long since you guys got McDonald-ed. That felt good. It felt right. But it has nothing to do with today’s tale. 
 
 Joseph worked in Exeter, California from 1973 to 1976. And in 1976, he joined the Auburn Police Force. 
 
 Auburn is a little former gold gush town of about 13,000 people on the outskirts of the Sacramento suburbs, where many of the Golden State Killer rapes and murders occurred in the mid and late 1970s. The majority of the crimes would take place in Sacramento County. 
 
 And Exeter is a smaller, former railroad stop town of about 10,000 people in the San Joaquin Valley under 30 miles from Sequoia National Park and 240 miles south of Sacramento and 210 miles north of Los Angeles. Big agricultural area. It’s also the home of Svenhard Bakery’s only distribution plant. So many pastries getting kicked out nationwide from Exeter’s largest employer. So many breakfast claws, raisin snails, cheese curls, berry horns, orange crinkles, cream puffs, huckle berry blintzes, cream snatches, dingle drips, maple roons, powder weasals, and other shit that I can’t enjoy anymore because it sends me blood sugar into an angry, dizzy spiral of madness. 
 
 Everything after berry horn was made up, by the way. A raisin snail is real apparently a real thing. Never heard of that guy. If I swing through Exeter, I’ll have to give it a shot. 
 
 And Exeter is only 15 minutes from Visalia (“Vi-sail-ya), a huge agricultural hub for Tulare County and home of over 130,000 people, where the Visalia (“Vi-sail-ya”) Ransacker, the home invader linked to the East Area Rapist who was then linked to the Golden State Killer - all those monikers belonging to the criminal who the press also dubbed the Original Night Stalker because he snuck into people’s homes and terrorized California families prior to Richard “the Night Stalker” Ramirez, well the Visalia (“Vi-sail- ya”) Ransacker ransacked the shit out of over 100 homes and where one guy, Claude Snelling, was killed during the ransacking. 
 
 So - Joseph James DeAngelo, JJD, was in the right places at the right times in addition to having the exact right DNA. 
 The Auburn Journal. They both attended Sierra College, a community college in Northern California. But they never got married, I’m guessing, because Joseph was already married.
 
 In 1973, Mr. DeAngelo, had married Sharon Huddle, who was 20 at the time and lived in Citrus Heights. Citrus Heights is less than 20 miles from Auburn. The balls on that guy! Getting your engagement notice posted in the paper in the town next over from the town you already live in with your wife. 
 
 Some witnesses had reported hearing the East Area Rapist utter the word “Mommy,” during assaults, although others thought it was actually “Bonnie,” the name of the Auburn woman he was once engaged to, according to Slate Magazine. Did a broken off engagement sent him into a misogynistic rage? Did he pull a Ted Bundy? 
 
 Sharon Huddle DeAngelo, his wife, became a lawyer and went on to help found the National Coalition Against Surrogacy, a Washington group started in 1987 that pushed for legislation to outlaw surrogacy, which, is, uh, a weird thing to try and eliminate. 
 
 Her brother, James Huddle, said that the couple raised three daughters but separated at some point. Mr. Huddle said he was stunned by Mr. DeAngelo’s arrest.
 
 Apparently, Richard and Sharon may still be technically married. It’s unclear based on multiple reports, some news outlets report him as married, others as divorced. 
 
 The three kids he has are all girls, which makes his raping just that much more heinous to me. His first daughter was born in September 1981, his second daughter was born in November 1986 and his third daughter was born in May 1989.
 
 Grant Gorman, who grew up in the neighborhood where DeAngelo lived, told the Sacramento Bee that he “avoided playing with one of DeAngelo’s daughters while they were young” because DeAngelo had an anger management problem.
 
 “This guy just had this anger that was just pouring out of him,” Gorman said to the newspaper. “He’d just be yelling at nothing in the backyard, pacing in circles.”
 
 Well, the girls seemed to have thrived in spite of their angry dad. 
 According to online records, one of DeAngelo’s daughters is a doctor in the Midwest. Another of his daughters is a PhD candidate at a university. The latter daughter is a graduate teaching assistant who wrote online that her research “is centered around understanding how unique message characteristics affect information processing in online environments.”
 
 How crazy is that those three braniacs came out of this man’s demon seed?
 
 After his arrest, his poor daughters, all of which seem to be kicking ass, have shut down their social accounts. Yeah, I bet. Who wants their inbox flooded with “Did your dad really rape all those women?” DMs. Fuck that would be terrible. You’re out there doing your best in the world. You’re a doctor. You’ve got a PhD, you’re working on important social media research, and all of the sudden, all anyone cares about is what you knew or didn’t know about your raping, murdering father. And you yourself are just processing the fact that he’s a monster, when up until your thirties you thought he was just a grumpy dude who dropped a lot of f bombs.
 
 His daughters are three more victims. That has to mess you up. I’d be consumed with my memories, trying to remember how he acted when he was home the day after a rape or the morning after a murder. Man that would be a mind fuck to think about your dad showing up and clapping at a softball game hours after raping and killing someone. 
 
 Not sure which daughter he was living with at the time of his arrest. 
 8. Faked being frail: We also know that JJD showed up at his initial court dates in a wheelchair acting like he could barely stand and like he was extremely fragile but, he was reportedly zipping around town on a motorcycle the week before he was arrested. 
 
 Very recently retired detective Paul Holes, the man whose DNA sleuthing led to his capture and the man who led the team that staked out Deangelo to get his DNA, a man who spent more than two decades searching for the killer and is still consulting on the case, claims that’s all an act, saying: ”He is a dangerous man -- he is not the decrepit individual you see in a wheelchair at the arraignment. He is a spry 72-year-old who is physically capable. He has numerous guns registered to him.”
 
 More information about Joseph will be pouring in, I imagine, over the next few years. Soon, we’ll know for sure if JJD is the guy, and if he is, we’ll know all about him. There will be several biographies, exclusive interviews. For now, what we do know, is a lot about the crimes that the fucking monster known as the Golden State Killer committed. Let’s take a look at those crimes now, in a Timesuck Timeline. 
 PAUSE TIMESUCK TIMELINE INTRO 
 III. Timeline of Crimes (ending at apprehension) 
 6. scaling fences and moving through off the road paths such parks, walkways, ditches, and trails.
 D. September 11, 1975: On September 11, 1975, the home invasions took a dark turn. 
 
 Roughly 18 months into the crime spree, the Ransacker broke into the home of forty-five year old Claude Snelling at 532 Whitney Lane (now South Whitney Street). Snelling was a journalism professor at the College of the Sequoias who had previously chased a prowler discovered under his daughter's window around 10:00 PM on February 5, 1975. His daughter, Beth Snelling, was a 16 year old cheerleader at Mt. Whitney High School. 
 
 So, this may have been the second time the Ransacker lurked around his home. 
 
 This night, Claude was awakened a little after 2 AM by some strange noises in his home. He got out of bed, left his bedroom, and shouted into the darkness as he ran through an open back door and confronted a ski-masked intruder in his carport attempting to kidnap his daughter, who had been subdued with threats of being stabbed or shot. Snelling was then shot twice, staggered back into the house to his wife, and later died. After the shooting the assailant hit Beth with his gun, kicked her, and then fled the scene, leaving behind a stolen bicycle at 615 Redwood Street.
 
 Beth recently spoke about her father for the first time publicly since 1975. She remembers spending hours hiking together in the mountains and traveling home together at the end of each day — her on a bike and him on foot.  "He was an ideal father and a great man," Hupp said. "He loved me and my brothers and my mom very much." 
 According to a 1975 local paper article, more than 500 mourners attended Snelling's funeral. It was one of the largest in the history of Miller's Chapel, owner Paul Miller said 
 
 The Visalia (“Vi-sail-ya”) Police Department committed more resources to apprehending the Ransacker after this murder and a $4000 reward was posted. Nighttime stakeouts were set up near houses that he had previously prowled. But, the ransackings continued.
 
 To date, no DNA evidence ties DeAngelo to Snelling, and authorities haven’t included his death into the official count of 12 murders. 
 
 Authorities, however, and his daughter Beth, firmly believe he’s the guy. 
 
 Less than a year after this attack, the rapes started.
 E. June 18 1976, five a.m a twenty-three-year-old woman in Rancho Cordova, a Sacramento suburb about 15 miles East of downtown, makes a 911 call. She speaks into the receiver as best she could from where she lied on the floor, her hands tied behind her back so tightly that she’d lost circulation. She reports a home invasion and a rape. A man wearing a mask had attacked her. The mask, “was white and made of a coarse, knit-like material, with eyeholes and a seam down the middle, but it fit very tight against his face” “He was about five nine, moderately muscular, wearing a navy blue, short- sleeved T-shirt and gray canvas gloves.” 
 
 He was holding a knife and he wasn’t wearing pants when she saw him. And he already had a boner. WTF!?!
 
 Damn it!! That would be the fucking worst. Like, when you see a masked man coming at you with a weapon, in your home, you know nothing good is coming with him. He’s definitely gonna take some of your shit, maybe break some of your shit, he’s probably gonna rough you up, and you may get raped and/or murdered. 
 
 But, when he comes in with a boner and no pants, you have to know you are for sure getting raped. All of the other stuff may also happen. But, he is for sure gonna do something horrible with at boner. I’m pretty sure only rapists walk into a stranger’s home with no pants, a knife, and a boner. 
 
 What else would they have on their mind? (lunatic) “Hey! Do you know how to get rid of one of these things? I just got really hard and stood up so I took my pants off to give it more room. I don’t like it. I want it to go away. I was thinking about cutting it off with this knife? Is that how you get rid of it!?!” 
 
 Well, sadly, this guy didn’t want to cut if off. What he did do was hold the four inch knife against her throat and then he put baby oil on his penis before he raped her. He rummaged and ransacked; she could hear the little knocker handles on the side tables in the living room clattering as he opened drawers. He spoke in a low guttural whisper, with a clenched jaw. By the time he was done, a one-inch cut near her right eyebrow bled from where he’d pressed the knife, ordering her not to make a sound. 
 
 He’d gotten in by moving a bird bath under her window and trying to cut the phone lines. Turned out he cut some of them but not all of them so at least she was able to call the police after he left. 
 
 Baby oil. What a strange detail. Why would he put that on first? “Hey! I’m gonna rape you, BUT, I don’t want it to hurt more than it needs to so I’m gonna lube up first.” Or was it, “Hey! I’m gonna rape you but I’m in a real hurry. That’s why I showed up pantless, hard, and lubed.” So bizarre. 
 F. July 17th 1976 a teenage girl is raped in Carmichael, just North of Rancho Cordova, a little over 10 miles from downtown Sacramento. 
 G. Aug. 29, 1976 another woman is raped in Rancho Cordova. She woke up to find the GSK cutting her window screen with a knife. Jesus. 
 H. Sept. 4, 1976 a woman in Citrus Heights is raped in her home. 
 I. Oct. 5, 1976, 6:30 AM. A woman is cuddling in bed with her three year old son at her home in Rancho Cordova. She heard a light switch go off in the house. Her husband had left for work minutes daughter shushed her. “Momma, be quiet.” Somebody pushed down on the woman’s bed abruptly and let go, as if to tell her he was still there.
 
 This is the kind of thing he did all the time to further terrorize his victims. He’d let them believe he’d left their house, then, just as their bodies would slacken, their numb fingers inching for their ligatures, he’d shock them with a sudden noise or movement.
 
 Really liked to fuck with him. Add a little extra psychological damage after already raping them. My God. 
 P. Weird Police Tip: Tips started pouring in to the police station around this time. Most of them weren’t helpful. Clearly, since he wasn’t caught. Some of them were insane. Like this one: A woman called about an employee at a local grocery store. The man’s penis, she said knowingly, “is very rough like it’s been used to death.”
 
 “Very rough, like it’s been used to death.” haha! Holy shit. Why are you banging some dude with a “rough penis”? That sounds more like he just doesn’t know how to use lube as opposed to overuse. I went through some phases when I was younger when I easily jerked off five plus times a day. And my dick, while it was exhausted and extremely sensitive after some of those marathon beatings - it was never “rough”. And it certainly was never “very rough”. If you have a very rough dick, you need to see a doctor. Or, you might want to try a new product from one of today’s sponsors. 
 
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 That was NOT today’s sponsor, or, a real product. Just a short break from the darkness and horror that is the GSK’s timeline. But - back to it!
 Q. Feb. 7, 1977: Another rape occurs in Citrus Heights on Feb. 7th, 1977. 
 R. February 16th 1977: On February 16th, 1977, another murder almost occurs at 10:30 PM. A family was settled into their home on Ripon Court in the Sacramento neighborhood of College-Glen, just 7-8 miles East of downtown. 
 
 Suddenly, they hear a crash that came from the backyard. It was the family’s electric smoker. They saw a figure running through their backyard. The son impulsively took off after this figure and his father grabbed a flashlight and followed him through the side door. The dad found himself trailing behind as he watched his son chase a blond- haired man. As the father reached the crest of the fence, a loud pop sounded and his son fell backward onto the lawn. “I’ve been shot,” he cried out as his father attended to him. Another shot followed, the shooter missing both men. A short time later an ambulance arrived and rushed the son to the hospital. The bullet entered his stomach and left multiple holes in his intestines, bladder, and rectum”. 
 
 At least he lived. After surgery, he described the prowler as, “a white male between twenty-five and thirty years old, five nine to five ten, with heavy legs and sandy blond neck-length hair, wearing a watch cap, a windbreaker, Levi’s cords, and tennis shoes.”
 
 Now, I’m not say that electric smoker was the reason the son ended up getting shot, BUT… had that family been using a sturdy, solidly crafted Weber Grill, there’s a good chance no one gets shot, which brings me to today’s first real sponsor. 
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 Okay, and now back, again, to the opposite of BBQ fun times. 
 T. March 8, 1977: The following month, on March 8th, another rape occurs near Robertson and Whitney avenues in Sacramento. The EAR forced open a sliding glass window and blindfolded and gagged his victim.
 
 small his dick was. 
 
 (Crack voice) “Don’t look at my dick! There’s nothing wrong with it! It’s a perfectly healthy penis! I HAVE A PERFECTLY HEALTHY PENIS!!!” 
 
 The Sacramento Sheriff’s office was so desperate to catch him by this point, they even worked briefly with a local psychic. She ate raw hamburger and chanted to get in touch with the EAR’s bio-rhythm. And, surprise, surprise, it didn’t work. She was able to get in touch with both E Coli and Salmonella. 
 
 I would’ve loved to have been in a briefing meeting while detectives were working with this psychic. 
 
 (Sargent) “Detectives Smith, Jackson, any updates from the psychic”
 
 (Detective Smith) “Nothing, Sarge.”
 
 (Sargent) “Did she eat the raw meat?”
 
 (Detective Jackson) “She did sir.”
 
 (Sargent) “And still nothing?”
 
 (Detective Smith) “Nothing happened as far as connecting to the rapist. She did become violently ill. She threw up everywhere. And that caused one of the rookies to throw up, which then caused some dude walking by to throw up, and then I threw up a tiny bit into my mouth.” 
 
 (Sargent) “And then what happened?” 
 
 (Detective Smith) “I swallowed it sir.” 
 
 (Sargent) “Good work, Smith. You and Jackson are excellent detectives. Since we’ve seemed to hit a dead end with the meat psychic, I want you guys to go ahead and hit up the “crime mime”, the “Clue Juggler”, and the guy who claims he can generate new leads by holding his breath underwater for more than three minutes.” 
 X. May 3, 1977: On May 3rd, 1977, the EAR strikes again with a rape in College Greens Station neighborhood of Sacramento, 9 miles Southeast of downtown. So strange to me he has yet to travel West of downtown for a single crime. The “abrupt glare of a flashlight, wakes a woman and her husband, a man who was a Major in the Air Force, around 3 AM.” The EAR acts like someone straining to appear tough, a bad actor who took gulping breaths in an attempt to seem angry and unhinged.
 Y. May 5, 1977: Two days later, on May 5th, another rape occurs near Madison and Main avenues in Orangevale, a suburb about 20 miles Northeast of downtown Sacramento. He holds up a woman and her husband at gunpoint outside their home, then raps her while her two children slept, before then ransacking the house”. The EAR performs a “brutal rape followed by a break to eat Ritz crackers in the kitchen. ”
 
 Total sociopath. No empathy for others AT ALL. Just gonna take a little rape break and go enjoy some ritz crackers. 
 Z. May 13th 1977: On May 13th, a family in Citrus Heights hears someone on their roof. Squad cars arrive within minutes and the roof creeper is gone. The next night, a block over, a young waitress and her husband, a restaurant manager, are the next victims.
 AA.May 14, 1977: The next night, May 14th, another rape occurs in Citrus Heights. He confronts a couple at gunpoint in their driveway before raping the woman from about 4 through 5:15 a.m.
 
 At this point, Sacramento home owners are concerned enough about this son of a bitch to start cutting down trees in shrubbery in their yards, so there wouldn’t be any place for cover. Floodlights were being bought in record numbers and, nearly three thousand guns were sold in Sacramento County between January and May. Some couples slept in shifts, one of them always stationed on the living room couch, a rifle pointed at the window.
 
 I get it! I can’t imagine how paranoid I’d be if I knew there was a serial rapist lurking around Coeur d’Alene. I hope I’d sit in my living room for at least a few hours a night with a loaded gun on my lap hoping he picks my house in that moment so I can rid the world of a monster. How terrible to just stew in fear like that. It really is crazy when you think about all the damage to society this one person has done in addition to committing the crimes themselves. 
 BB. May 17, 1977: On May 17th, 1977, the day I was born, the one and only time I touched my mom’s vagina back at Syringa hospital in Grangeville, Idaho, the town I was born in only because Riggins is far too small to support a hospital of its own, another rape occurs, this time in Carmichael again. 
 
 The East Area Rapist told the victim he would kill someone if there was any press coverage of the assault, but later told her husband he would kill if there wasn't any press coverage. He’s insane. The first sketch of the suspect was released after this assault. The previous November, a man fitting the new description had packed town-hall discussion on the EAR and actually stood up and criticized the investigation. This possible connection contributed to the impression that the EAR was brazen enough to attend events dedicated to his own capture. 
 
 During the May 17th attack, the EAR told the woman he was attacking, “Those fuckers, those pigs—do you hear me? I’ve never killed before but I’m going to kill now. I want you to tell those fuckers, those pigs, I’m going to go home to my apartment. I have bunches of televisions. I’m going to listen to the radio and watch television and if I hear about this, I’m going to go out tomorrow night and kill two people. People are going to die.“You tell those fucking pigs that I could have killed two people tonight. If I don’t see that all over the papers and television, I’ll kill two people tomorrow night.’ 
 
 Crazy that at this time he’s a police officer still. Solving crimes by day apartment and I’ll be watching them. If this is on the news, I’ll kill two people.” It was a little after 4 AM when the first officer entered the opened rear patio door of the home after the woman called 911. He heard the woman call out, “Well, I guess the East Area Rapist is the South Area Rapist now”
 FF.September 6, 1977: On September 6th, he changes his location up a bit more, raping a 27 year old housewife near Lincoln Village, a little north of Stockton, about 45 miles South of Sacramento. 
 GG.October 1, 1977: The following month, on October 1st, he returns to the East Area, raping a 17 year old girl who was visiting her boyfriend in Rancho Cordova.
 HH.October 21, 1977: Three weeks later he rapes a woman the East Area again, this time in Antelope, about 12-13 miles Northeast of downtown Sac. He raped a woman and left her and her husband to be untied by their two small children.
 II. October 29 & November 10th, 1977: He rapes again in Sacramento on October 29th and then on November 10th, he rapes a 13 years old girl in Sacramento. Fuuuuuuuuck. Thirteen years old. 
 
 Her name is Margaret Wardlow, and she recently spoke to the San Francisco Chronicle about the attack. And she is one tough woman who was one badass, tough kid. 
 
 She said she remembers being woken up with a flashlight in her face and a man with leather gloves standing over her bed. He told her to turn over and began to tie her up. At first, she thought it was some kind of joke, but then she thought: “This must be the East Area Rapist.”
 
 She said she knew all about him from reading newspaper accounts and watching TV. “I felt like I had a bit of dossier about him, which was really lucky,” she said. “Not very many people have that before a rape.”
 
 That night, she and her mother had gone over to a neighbor’s house to have dinner and listen to a new record. They hadn’t locked their door because they had an 80-pound golden retriever at home, and they felt generally safe in their area, Wardlow said.
 
 It was a school night for her, so she went to bed early when they got home. It was about 2:30 a.m. when Wardlow woke up to find the man with leather gloves standing over her bed. He had gone into her mother’s room and stacked plates on her back, threatening to kill her and her daughter if he heard the plates fall — something he did in other attacks.
 
 “I absolutely understood that he got off on control by fear,” Wardlow said. “I just wanted to make him not get what he wanted, which was to see me fearful.” She stayed calm throughout the attack, she said.
 
 He tied her ankles and her hands so tightly that blood vessels popped out on her wrists, then blindfolded her, and asked her if she had had sex before. She told him no. “He had a brief period of anal sex with me and then went in and out of the room,” she said.
 
 “I had this strong feeling of what are you doing here? We have nothing here for you,” she said. “Maybe it was a kid’s reaction to this stuff, but I just kept thinking, why are you here?”
 
 Wardlow remembers that her mom started screaming at some point. Wardlow was able to get her ankles untied and ran up the stairs, where she locked herself in the bathroom. Her mom came upstairs too, and they called the police. The attacker had fled the scene.
 
 She said that she became discouraged relatively quickly when he wasn’t caught and continued on his violent spree, but that she didn’t want the attack to take over her life.
 
 “I’ve never shed a single tear over this whole thing,” she said. “It wasn’t like I tried to forget it, but it didn’t play into my life.” She followed the case on and off, but wasn’t keeping close track.
 
 She was in San Diego on the night of DeAngelo’s arrest. When she got back from a movie and dinner with her husband, she noticed she missed two calls from a number with a Sacramento area code. It was a retired detective whom she’d never met but who knew about her rape. He told her that the man believed to be the East Area Rapist was in custody.
 
 “I was literally like kicking my husband, saying, ‘They’ve got him, they’ve got him,’” she said. “I barely slept that night because I was so ecstatic.”
 
 Wardlow says she plans to follow the trial and maybe travel to Sacramento for some of it. “I think justice will take its course now,” she said.
 
 Damn it. Dude is a true monster. 
 JJ. December 2, 1977: On December 2nd, he attempts another rape in the East Area and is chased off by two teenage boys before he can go through with it.
 KK.January 28, 1978: On January 28th, 1978, he kicked in the door of a house near American River College in Sacramento and tied up two teen girls and sexually assaulted them both. 
 LL.February 2, 1978: Then, on February 2nd, he carries out the double homicide he’d been telling so many rape victims he was going to commit. He murders Brian and Katie Maggiore in Rancho Cordova.
 
 They were walking their dog at about 9 PM when they encountered their killer.
 
 As the confrontation turned violent, Brian Maggiore, an administrative specialist at what used to be Mather Air Force Base east of Sacramento, and his wife tried to get away, The New York Times reported.
 
 Detectives speculated that the suspect, who shot the young couple in dropped ski mask. 
 YY. April 5, 1979: On April Rape in Fremont. A 27-year-old woman is assaulted at knifepoint after being forced to stack dishes on her husband's back, much like the October 7th rape. 
 ZZ. June 2nd, 1979: On June 2nd, a seventeen year-old his raped in Walnut Creek, twenty-five miles East of San Francisco.
 
 She’d been a babysitter and for over a month she had been receiving anonymous calls as she babysat. “The girl sat regularly for two families. In early May, a nightgown and telephone directory went missing from her own house; even so, she didn’t feel the hot breath of a threat moving in close. 
 
 No anonymous calls came for the babysitter in Walnut Creek that Saturday night; there was no sense that a silent phone meant that an alternate approach was being considered and planned. She was sitting at the kitchen table when she heard footsteps or a man’s voice; she couldn’t remember which came first, only that he shot up suddenly, as if spring-loaded from the dark hallway and into her terrified heart. He tied her wrists tightly with plastic cable ties. He bit her left nipple.
 
 AAA.June 25th, 1979: That same month, on June 25th, 13 year old Mary Berwert is raped in a home less than 100 feet from the previous attack. Another thirteen year old. Jesus. Mary also spoke to the San Francisco Chronicle after DeAngelo’s capture. 
 
 The night of the 25th, she was awakened by breathing and opened her eyes to find a masked man holding a knife against her throat.
 
 The EAR tied her hands and feet with white twine and stuffed a bra in her mouth.
 
 He knew her sister was sleeping in the next room and her father was down the hall. He told her in “an evil scratchy whisper” that he would kill her and her family if she made a sound. Before raping Berwert, he asked her if she had ever had sex.
 
 “That day that girl was gone. After that, I was never going to be the same,” she said. “He was a life-stealing, evil encroacher. He insinuated himself on my life and my family’s life and my community’s life, and so many other lives.”
 
 Her memory of the assault is still vivid, terrifying. Berwert said the man in the mask ordered her to remain quiet when he left, so she waited silently for 45 minutes, saying to herself over and over, “mind over matter,” before she broke the ties on her legs and ran to her father’s room.
 
 The look on her father’s face when she woke him up still haunts her. He jumped out of his bed and went to the phone to call police. Not knowing whether the rapist was still in the house, she tried to grab a kitchen knife, but her hands were still bound behind her.
 
 “Get those things off her!” her father screamed to her sister, who quickly cut off the ties and hugged her until police arrived.
 
 Investigators later told Berwert that the rapist had probably been watching her from a perch near the Eichler home, which had an open glass atrium and sat at the end of a long cul de sac. Berwert said she tried to forget the attack and, with help from many friends and family members, dived into life with vigor, becoming a cheerleader.
 
 “I just wanted to be a normal person, and I wasn’t going to let it stop me, but I felt I had a neon sign on my forehead,” she said. “It was a long time before I felt people couldn’t see it anymore.” Her father never got over what had happened under his roof, she said. Arman Berwert died of a heart attack three years after the rape. He was only 49. 
 
 “I was his little girl. I believe it killed him,” she said, crying again. “He died with a broken heart.”
 
 Berwert eventually forged a successful career in retail sales. The arrest, she said, has lifted a tremendous weight. If DeAngelo is convicted, she plans to cook popcorn and laugh heartily.
 
 “He can sit and dwell on it until he dies,” Berwert said. “We’re now at the spot in the road where our paths are meeting again. I like my side of the road.”
 
 I love the laugh detail. Hopefully, if he is found guilty, his 72 year old ass gets raped in prison. By someone with a much bigger dick than what he’s got. Poetic justice. I really wish this guys did not get to spend their final years watching TV and working on arts and crafts in prison. 
 
 June 11, 1979: Another rape occurs in Danville on June 11th. 
 BBB.September 1979: In late September of 1979, a young, upset man in his early twenties approached a woman in Goleta as she’s leaving for work in the morning. Goleta is over 300 miles south of San Francisco, almost 400 miles from Sacramento. 
 
 Now, no article I can find says exactly when Joseph James DeAngelo was fired from the Auburn police force in in 1979, but they all say he was fired. His former police chief was recently interviewed. Remember, Auburn is Northeast of Sacramento. 
 
 And now, suddenly, he shifts his criminal focus way down south. Doesn’t seem like a coincidence. Guessing when more details emerge we’ll hear about how he told his family he was down their job hunting, or that he moved down there for a time, or dated someone from the area, claimed he did, something. 
 
 The man told the woman that his dog had been stabbed in her backyard the night before. 
 
 When he’d been walking in the area, the young man in Goleta said he’d exited a footbridge into the residential neighborhood, and that’s when his dog, Kimo, darted between her house and her next-door according to Keith’s brother who also witnessed the crime scene, “broken”. “Were it not for the ceiling, you might think they’d fallen from a great height, such was the spread of blood beneath them.”
 GGG.February 6, 1981: Another rape and murder occurs in nearby Irvine on Feb. 6th, 1981. This time the victim is Manuela Witthuhn. 
 
 Twenty-eight year-old Manuela’s husband was sick and in the hospital at the time. 
 
 She was sexually assaulted before being brutally bludgeoned to death. “They noted the massive head injury, ligature marks, and some bruising on her right hand. There was a mark on her left buttock that the coroner would later conclude was likely from a punch.
 
 Sadly, her husband, David, who died in 2008, was initially a suspect in his wife's slaying before DNA evidence cleared him.
 HHH. July 27, 1981: On July 27th, Cheri Domingo and Gregory Sanchez are murdered, this time back up in Goleta, just a few blocks from some of the Golden State Killer’s previous victims.
 
 Twenty-seven year old Sanchez suffered a nonfatal gunshot wound to the cheek before being bludgeoned with a garden tool. Thirty-five year-old Domingo was raped before being killed.
 
 Cheri Domingo was a single mother. The day before the murder, Cheri and her teenage daughter had gotten in to a fight. Debbie, had run away. She called her mother from the beach. The call ended with, “Why don’t you just get the hell out of my life!” she screamed. She slammed down the phone.” These would be the last words that mother and daughter ever spoke to each other. 
 
 Damn! Think about how many lives this piece of shit damaged in so many ways. He raped somewhere around 50 women, maybe more than that even, killed over a dozen human beings, and inflicted extreme emotional damage on hundreds of other family members, friends, neighbors, coworkers. All the kids whose parents were taken from them, all the parents whose kids were taken from them. Kids who were in the home when it happened - how much is that gonna fuck you up? And none of this even counts all the ransackings, how many families he left feeling unsafe and violated after rummaging through their homes. If Joseph James DeAngelo is found guilty, I truly, truly, truly hope he suffers. IMMENSELY before he dies. If demons are real I hope they taunt the fuck out of him. No forgiveness. You don’t get to cry crocodile tears and be given another chance in this situation. 
 
 Wish I could fill his cell full of about 500 rabid sewer rats. Let ‘em eat him to death in tiny little bites. Chew that little dick right off of his 72 year old worthless meat sack. 
 
 If he’s guilty of course. No redemption. “Too little, too diddle, Pootie!” 
 
 After Sheri and Gregory are killed, it seems ask if the East Area Rapist aka the Golden State Killer pushes pauses on his mayhem. Two months later, or less depending on the exact date, his Joseph James DeAngelo’s first child is born in September of 1981. Again, doesn’t feel like a coincidence. his wife is in the final few weeks of pregnancy and he just doesn’t have time for raping and killing. How fucked is that they he can just turn it on and off? 
 III. May 4, 1986: And then, five years later, the GSK comes out from retirement to strike one more time. While Joseph’s wife is a few months pregnant with their second child, the GSK rapes and murders 18 year old Janelle Cruz in Irvine, bludgeoning her with a pipe wrench while her family vacationed in Mexico.
 
 A real-estate agent discovered the restaurant cashier's body the day after she died. An autopsy showed that blows to the head killed her.
 
 And then, apparently, if Joseph James DeAngelo is the guy, he seems to have left crime behind and raised three kids outside of Sacramento. Became a grandpa. Worked for years at a grocery store distribution center. Ridden around on his motorcycle. And, by the 90s, when he still wasn’t a suspect for even one of the terrible crimes he committed - the only mark on his rap sheet still being that shoplifting charge that got him fired from the police force back in 1979, he had to have thought that he’d for sure gotten away with all of it forever. 
 
 And then, less than two months ago, his old life and all the disgusting choices that were a part of it came rushing back. And now he sits in a cell, awaiting a murder trial, knowing that barring some sort of dark miracle, he’ll never walk free again. 
 
 And that takes us out of the life and oh so many terrible crimes of the Golden State Killer, and out of this timeline. 
 PAUSE TIMESUCK TIMELINE OUTRO 
 IV. Who Caught Him? 
 A. Detective Paul Holes: So - who eventually cracked this case? This case that was cold for so many years? While a lot of detectives worked the case over the years, the one who stuck with it the longest was BOJANGLES!!!!
 
 YES! One eye, three legs, and the greatest pitbull detective the world had ever seen. He was brought in to take a look at the case on the afternoon of April 24th at 8PM. He took one sniff of an old mask found at a crime scene over three decades ago, and by 8:32PM, he had his teeth on the suspect’s throat. 
 
 And by the time Joseph made it in to the station he was missing his dick and Bojangles had a new, tiny chew toy. If only they’d called him in earlier. Praise Bojangles! Good boy. Good boy. 
 
 But seriously, Detective Paul Holes is the man that cracked the case arrests, which we’re going to briefly talk about, after today’s Idiots of the Internet
 PAUSE IDIOTS OF THE INTERNET 
 V. Idiots of the Internet A. To check in with today’s idiots, we check out a recent video titled, “How DNA Analysis Led Police to the Golden State Killer.” published by SciShow on May 4th. And, it’s about what you’d think. It provides, in under six minutes, a nice summary of the DNA database investigating Detective Holes and his team did. It’s great. 
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAFJ3WfXhOY
 1. And underneath this video, user Tyler Matthew Harris posts “Why are we okay with the government having access to our DNA?” 
 
 Are you fucking serious, Tyler? We’re okay with it, or at least I am, in the context in which it was used here, so pieces of shit like the Golden State Killer can be apprehended, taken off the streets, and punished. Imagine if this existed after rape number one instead of rape number 50+? Or imagine if this existed after the 30th ransacking when no one had been raped or killed yet? All those future crimes could’ve have been prevented. That is why I, at least, am okay with it. If you don’t have anything to hide, why do you care? The government didn’t access DNA information people wanted to remain private. They didn’t access the Ancestry dot com or 23 and me databases. They accessed the information people willingly made public when then uploaded the results of their DNA analysis to GED match. 
 2. User WeTube posts “One Love”. “One Love” in the comment section of a video about the GSK. How do you feel that this comment is even remotely relevant here? What does “one love” have to do with the GSK, or catching him, or the technology we used to catch him? 
 
 Imagine if Detective Holes acted like WeTube at the press conference announcing that his team had apprehended and charged Joseph James DeAngelo. 
 
 (Reporter) “Detective Holes, can you tell us how you caught the Golden State Killer?” 
 
 (Holes) “One love. One love everybody. Thank you for your time. That is all.” 
 
 User Bre Fujimoto immediately replied with, “you sound like a korean boyband”. 
 
 Exactly Fujimoto, exactly. 
 3. User Radix posts “In other words, if anybody in your family has ever used a DNA service, you are in a database that can be searched by cops without a warrant.” 
 
 To which user Devon Clancy posts, “If you put private info into a public data base that info becomes public? Whaaaat no way!”
 
 Love the sarcasm, Devon. God Bless you! Exactly! Is this Tyler Matthew posting again under a different username? 
 
 If you’ve fucking murdered someone Radix, and one of your relatives puts some shared DNA willingly on a public website… YES - they should absolutely be able to use that information to catch you. 
 
 If you haven’t killed and/or raped anyone, why are you worried? 
 
 So much pushback on this in the comment section by the way, and I don’t like it. I’m very pro-freedom, but when it comes to assisting law enforcement to catch violent offenders, I’m gonna give some of that freedom up. Throw my DNA around all you want. I got nothing to hide. 
 4. User Peter Welsh goes Super Sleuth and catches what no one else in America was smart enough to notice: “So he's going to go free because the police stole his identity. By using his dna to set up a fake account they broke the law in attempt to enforce. That's a big fat no no.”
 
 A big fat no no you guys! Someone put Peter in touch with the Golden State Killer’s public defender. Peter’s gonna have him walking out of that cell in under five minutes. No one, I mean NO ONE, knows DNA law like Peter Welsh!!! “Better luck next time Detective Holes - you just got Welshed!!!!!!” 
 5. And then, we have our weekly virtue signaler. For a bit I was worried they wouldn’t show up, but then User Pyromen321 posts, “This golden state killer guy is a real jerk.” 
 
 We thought it, you said it Pyromen321. You lit the internet on fire with that one pyro, you virtuous flamethrower. 
 
 Someday, if he gets a marked grave, which I hope he doesn’t, it should be inscribed with, “Here lies a ‘real jerk’”
 
 And that’s it for today’s Idiots of the Internet. 
 PAUSE IDIOTS OF THE INTERNET 
 VI. DNA technology leading to more arrests. 
 A. DNA technology has led to more arrests. (WA state murder): Alright, before we recap and add that little bit of new info, I want to talk a bit more about DNA investigations. ‘Cause that’s what we do here on the Suck. Give that extra info that the other podcasts covering the same subject aren’t gonna touch. Hail Nimrod! 
 
 A SeaTac man was arrested Thursday, May 17th - my birthday! - for the death of a Vancouver, BC, woman killed 31 years ago in Western Washington along with her boyfriend - thanks to more ancestral DNA suffer like that, it just wasn't fair to make me sit and wright until my bones aked, until my hand felt every horrid pain it ever had and as I wrote, I got mader and mader until I cried, I cried because I was ashamed I cried because I was discusted, I cried because I was mad, and I cried for myself, kid who kept on having to write those dane sentances. My Angryness from Sixth grade will scar my memory for life and I will be ashamed for my sixth grade year forever"
 
 The last carries a hand-drawn map of what appears to be a suburban neighborhood, with the word "punishment" scrawled across the reverse side of the paper. Investigators were unable to identify the area depicted in the map, although it was clear that the artist had knowledge of architectural layout and landscape design 
 
 I don’t really see how being mad about your 6th grade teacher cancelling some filed trips and making you write a bunch leads to a lot of rape and murder, but, I’m not a murdering rapist. Maybe that’s all it takes for some people. 
 1. Also in 1977, someone claiming to be the EAR called the Sacramento Sheriff’s department numerous times, saying stuff like, ”I’m the East Side Rapist and I have my next victim already stalked and you guys can't catch me.
 2. Numerous victims were also called after being attacked - how messed up is that? The latest call came in back in 2001. On April 6, 2001, one day after an article was published in the Sacramento Bee that confirmed the Original Night Stalker and the East Area Rapist were the same person, a victim of the East Area Rapist received a call from him during which he asked, "Remember when we played?" before hanging up 
 
 Well, how do you like the game you’re playing now, Joe? Guessing it isn’t ending how you envisioned it? How the fellow inmates treating you? How’s the food? How does it feel to go from being the one who had all the power to the one who has none? Guessing your three daughters will now how nothing to do with you. I hope they abandon you to rot. I hope you want nothing more than to just kill yourself but lack the means to do it and have to keep waking up to the ongoing nightmare you made for yourself. 
 
 It’ll be very interesting to see what comes up in the trial. At the moment, we don’t even know when it’s going to begin. 
 
 For now, let’s recap with some top five takeaways. PAUSE TOP FIVE TAKEAWAYS
 VIII.Top Five Takeaways 
 1. Number One. Crime scene evidence, including DNA, shows that the Visalia Ransacker, the East Area Rapist aka the Original Night Stalker, and the Golden State Killer are all the same man. And it seems as if that man is 72 year old Joseph James DeAngelo. 
 2. Number Two. If Joseph really is the right guy, than police have just solved one of the most important cold cases in US criminal history, catching a man believed to have committed at least 12 murders, more than 50 rapes, and over 100 burglaries in California from 1974 to 1986.
 3. Number Three. After getting away with all of his crimes for over three decades, the Golden State Killer was tracked down using a genealogy website by Detective Paul Holes. When the match came back from detectives taking some DNA off of Joseph’s car, which was parked at Hobby Lobby, btw, how excited were those guys? Over 30 years and finally a match! Surprised Holes didn’t show up at the press conference with a wrist broken from all the high fiving that had to have been going on around the office. 
 4. Number four. If Joseph James DeAngelo really is the guy, not only do all know he’s a ransacking, raping, murdering piece of shit, we also know he has a tiny dick, and I think that’s fantastic. 
 5. Number five. New info! I’m guessing a fair amount of you listening who are somewhat familiar with the case keep thinking, when are you gonna talk about Michelle McNamara? Right now. Michelle McNamara was a true crime writer who was married to one of my favorite comics, Patton Oswalt, before she died in April of 2016. And she was obsessed with the Golden State Killer. Patton and her research assistant, Billy Jensen finished her book about GSK, "I’ll Be Gone in the Dark: One Woman’s Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer” posthumously. She is, in fact, the person who coined the moniker, Golden State Killer. And her book was one of the primary sources for this episode’s research. And she’s credited for helping keep investigator’s interested in this case. 
 
 Patton Oswald interviewed Detective Holes - HOT FOR HOLES! - and said, “[Holes] told me he regarded Michelle as his “investigative partner. She just wasn’t riding shotgun with me.” He also offered some insight into the politics of the force: “Law enforcement is funny, because even though, particularly in this case, where the model of an interagency cooperative, there’s still territorial boundaries. Michelle had the freedom to call anyone she wanted whether it be victims or witnesses or original investigators across various jurisdictions, so she talked to people that I hadn’t and find out details that weren’t written in the case files and she would pass those on to me.”
 
 So, she wasn’t just writing about true crime, she was actively helping solve a case. Bummer she couldn’t still be here with us when they caught him, but pretty cool that Patton is standing in for her. RIP Michelle McNamara. 
 PAUSE TOP FIVE TAKEAWAYS 
 IX. Closing announcements A. The Golden State Killer - tossed in the Suck pile. Whooo! 
 
 Gotta say thank you for the wisdom of our Space Lizards. They voted sense of your God’s messages and than acting accordingly is very different than thinking spirits are actively talking to you and telling you to do things. That, to me, screams of mental illness. I’ve heard a lot of people actively talking to God, and most of them were blatantly mentally ill people living on the streets of Los Angeles. 
 
 By neighbor wants to talk to me about God’s word, in a religious sense, fine. I’ll talk. 
 
 My neighbor wants to tell me what Mother Mary has been recently commanding him to do? I’m personally calling a local mental health center and finding what I need to do to have someone come evaluate him because I for sure think he’s mentally ill. Does that clear it up? 
 B. And, now, a fun message from Down Under Sucker Jess Mulroy
 
 Message: Hey Dan, I’ve been listening to timesuck since you released your 2nd ep. I used to type your name into pandora and you’re responsible for so much of my comedy discovery. I just wanted to get it out there that you’ve become a weird kind of imaginary friend to me. I’m a cleaner in Byron Bay, Australia, and since I work alone, I spend so much time with headphones in. I listen to you so much, that I even go through times of being annoyed by you when I’ve listened to exclusively your stuff for days on end.. and missing you when I run out of podcasts. You’ve gotten me through some really shitty times, and been there when I just want to laugh. I have a pet pig, and if he hears your voice on my speaker at home, he whinges at the door for me to come outside so we can listen together. No questions here- I just didn’t want to go any longer without letting you know that your love of learning, and your ability to be humble and caring to your listeners is refreshing and appreciated. Mumma always said- of someone is important to you- don’t let it go unnoticed:) . Sorry for the rant- HAIL NIMROD! Thanks again, love Jess and Piggy Smalls.
 C. Another fun message from an unnamed Sucker whose email handle is Hi I’m Paul. 
 
 “Woah, I'm back again and this time I'm better than ever. Somehow you've managed to change my life in so many ways, from making friends to finding new interests and surprise suprise, you've done it again. Recently for my school's drama program I decided to do an an original stand up routine, for a student showcase, and the class loved it. I was inspired by you're comedy and wrote my own original jokes on the topic "love".
 
 The joke was that I use Christianmingle.com and my username was @comegetpsalms. 
 
 I didn't think it was very funny but I got nominated for our class awards ceremony for both best line and most memorable. And I owe it all to you suck lord. Thanks again and always.And i hope you don't mind me writing in to you it's just you really are a major part of my life now. Thanks again. Keep on sucking.
 - shanersj@gmail.com (Hi I’m Paul) “
 
 Congrats Paul! Glad you won a standup award. That’s fantastic. Enjoy it. Enjoy all the victories man. 
 
 D. A Poe update from Timesucker Austin Steers 
 
 Message: Attention Reverend Doctor General Suckington II, I just listened to the Poe bonus suck and noticed you mentioned the two finger flip off and where it comes from. Yes, the going theory is that it comes from English longbowman in the 100 year’s war showing their ability to still fire arrows. However, it comes from that because when the French would capture English archers, they would amputate the index and middle fingers because the English archers were incredibly deadly accurate and would demolish French forces. Thus, when an archer was still in possession of those fingers, he would display them and basically say “hey bitch, I still have my fingers, fuck you frenchy.” You were definitely on the right track but hopefully that extra little info helps make it more clear as to how it came about. Hope you have a good day, and keep on sucking!
 E. And another Poe update from long time Sucker Thomas Fogg:
 
 Hey Dan, 
 
 Quick update on the Edgar Allen Poe suck from my girlfriend actually. I didn’t even notice at the beginning of the episode when you were listing things that Poe is the father of, but upon the request of my girlfriend, Sara, I rewound and found it. In the interest of giving credit where credit is due, especially to historical women, the MOTHER of modern science fiction is Mary Shelley. You may remember her writing of Frankenstein, but you may not be aware of her many short stories, poems, etc. Most notably to me is her poem, Ozymandias (Oh-zy-men-diaz) , which was a poem about A. The Egyptian pharaoh Ramses II and B. About the finite nature of life and how even the most powerful important people of their day die and loose any “permanent progress” they make in this world. It’s most notable to me because this would be the poem that led to Allen Moore naming the anti-hero, Ozymandias (Oh-zy-men-diaz) in his most popular and famous work, Watchmen. But, I digress, Poe can be credited with many things, but science fiction goes to Mary Shelley.
 PAUSE TIMESUCKER UPDATES OUTRO 
 XI. Goodbye A. Well that’s all for today Suckers. Please, keep spreading, rating, and reviewing the Suck, have a great week, don’t ransack, rape, or kill anyone - keep your tiny dick rage in check, and keep on sucking!
 
 
 Sources: 
 https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2018/06/gedmatch-police- genealogy-database/561695/
 https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2018/05/the-coming-wave-of- murders-solved-by-genealogy/560750/