Understanding Relationships: Formation, Development, and Communication - Prof. Rajesh Gaur, Study notes of Communication

Download Understanding Relationships: Formation, Development, and Communication - Prof. Rajesh Gaur and more Study notes Communication in PDF only on Docsity! 1 Communication and Relational Dynamics Chapter Summary •Why We Form Relationships •Relational Development and Maintenance •Communication About Relationships •Metacommunication 2 Why We Form Relationships Relationships •Appearance •Especially important in the early stages of the relationship •The physically attractive are more likely to be seen as desirable. •Similarity •We like people who are similar to us. •Friends with equally low levels of communication skills are just as satisfied as those with high levels. •Attraction is greatest when people are similar in a high percentage of important areas. 5 Why We Form Relationships Relationships •Proximity •We develop relationships with those with whom we share space. •In many cases, proximity leads to liking. •On the other side, familiarity can also breed contempt. •Rewards •Social Exchange Theory •We often seek out people who can give us rewards that are greater than or equal to the costs we encounter when dealing with them. •Rewards – Costs = Outcome 6 Relational Development and Maintenance Models of Relational Development •Developmental Models •Knapp’s Ten Stages fit into three phases. FIGURE 8.1 Page 272 7 Relational Development and Maintenance Models of Relational Development •Initiating •Communication during this stage is usually brief. •Making polite conversation and sharing innocuous conversations •Experimenting •Deciding whether this person is worth pursuing further •Uncertainty reduction •Intensifying •The interpersonal relationship truly begins to develop. 10 Relational Development and Maintenance Models of Relational Development •Stagnating •If Circumscribing continues, relationship enters stagnating stage. •The relationship becomes a shell of what it once was. •Avoiding •When the relationship becomes unpleasant, avoidance occurs. •Making the effort to stay away from the other person is evident. •Terminating •Summary dialogues and eventually termination 11 Relational Development and Maintenance Models of Relational Development •Other models offer for a less sequential approach FIGURE 8.3 Page 278 12 Relational Development and Maintenance Dialectical Perspectives •Connection vs. Autonomy •No one is an island. •All of us have different needs. •Openness vs. Privacy •We need to disclose. •We also need a level of privacy. •Predictability vs. Novelty 15 Relational Development and Maintenance Characteristics of Relationships •Relationships Require Maintenance •Communication accounts for as much as 80% of the difference between satisfying relationships and unsatisfying ones. •Five Strategies •Positivity •Openness •Assurances •Social networks •Sharing tasks 16 Relational Development and Maintenance Repairing Relationships •Minor vs. Significant •Recognize when a problem is easy to solve. •Social vs. Relational •Some transgressions violate social rules. •Deliberate vs. Unintentional •Transgressions are not always intentional. •One-time vs. Incremental 17 Relational Development and Maintenance Repairing Relationships •Strategies for Relational Repair •Talk about the transgression. •Apologies offer no guarantee the problem will go away. •Apologies will be convincing only if succinct with nonverbal behaviors matching words spoken. •Forgiving Transgressions •Forgiving others has personal and relational benefits. •Remember some transgressions are harder to forgive than others. 20 Communicating About Relationships Repairing Relationships •Respect •Love does not always denote respect. •Respect is very important within interpersonal relationships. •Being respected is a vital ingredient of self-esteem. •Control •The degree to which parties in the relationship have influence. •Healthy relationships manage the degree of control. •Partners should try to share power equally when issues are important to both. 21 Communicating About Relationships Metacommunication •Metacommunication •The term used to describe messages people exchange about their relationships – communication about their communication •Whenever we discuss relationships with others, we are metacommunicating. •Not just a tool for handling problems but a way to reinforce satisfying aspects of the relationship 22 Communication and Relational Dynamics Chapter Summary •Why We Form Relationships •Relational Development and Maintenance •Communication About Relationships •Metacommunication