theories of interpersonal relationships, Summaries of Communication

Download theories of interpersonal relationships and more Summaries Communication in PDF only on Docsity! Interpersonal relationships is a reciprocal social and emotional interactions between two or more individuals in an environment. Relationships vary based on experiences they encounter. Hence there are both positive and negative experiences of interaction in a relationship. This essay explains the positive and negative experiences of interaction in a romantic relationship in relation to social exchange theory and equity theory. Social exchange theory happens when individuals weigh the potential costs and rewards of a social relationship. Rewards are things that one gets out of a relationship such as fun, companionship and emotion intimacy while costs are things that one sees as negative such as having to put money, time and effort. “How much value is placed on each cost and benefit is subjected and determined by an individual”, (Nickerson: 2023) I remember in 2021 when my friend Rosmary kabaghe was in a relationship with a boy named Henry Munthali. It was after writing MSCE when these two started a romantic relationship. They enjoyed spending time together and shared many common interest. For example, they both liked watching football hence they never missed games on television. Sometimes they went at Mzuzu stadium to watch football. Rosemary and henry also had a deep emotional connection and they shared their feelings openly as well as confiding in one another. When Rosemary’s grandmother passed away, it was amazing to see how Henry supported her during the whole mourning period. He helped in collecting money from different households to support the funeral ceremony. Besides that, the two bought gifts for each other on their birthdays. Despite all of this, there was more to their relationship. Rosemary invested more money, time, energy and effort into the relationship compared to Henry. Furthermore, their relationship was concealed from rosemary’s parents because they were so strict with her. They told her that it was not time for dating yet. This was not the case with henry’s parents as to them Henry was at the right age to date. Since they resided at different areas, rosemary walked a distance of 30 kilometres to and from Henry’s residence. As a result, she was being shouted at for coming home late most of the times. Henry had a bicycle so it was easy for him to meet rosemary. Again, whenever they met, she did household chores at henry’s house and she even run errands such as going to the maize mill. Rosemary had a part time job. She often ended up paying for most of their shared interests such as outings and shopping. She also provided more emotional support to henry such as listening to his problems and offer advice. On the other hand, whenever she encountered a problem, Henry shouted at her for messing up things. Since these were early months of their relationship called the honeymoon phase, Rosemary decided to dismiss and ignore the costs and she somehow exaggerated the benefits. This is what describes a social exchange theory since henry was trying to get everything out of the relationship that he could without giving anything back. After sometime, she started feeling overworked and underappreciated. It was inequitable kind of relationship since she was putting in more than what she received. This led to dissatisfaction and emotional distress. In her article Cherry (2023) mentioned that social exchange theory is based on give and take, if not considered equitable it affects relationship health. Hence Rosemary decided to take action and correct the imbalance. Rosemary wanted to strive for fairness in their relationship. This is called equity theory. A more complex version of social exchange theory. Comparing to her previous partner Precious who showered her with more displays of affection, bought a lot of things for her and always provided transport fee so they can meet while she invested effort, energy and time, Henry was way too different. Obviously she expected the same from Henry. Equity theory states that people make comparisons between what they contribute to a relationship and what they receive in return. They should both benefit the rewards and the costs should be balanced. According to Devito (2004:245), the general idea behind equity theory is that if one is under benefited, she or he will get angry and dissatisfied so the greater the inequity, the greater the dissatisfaction and the greater the likelihood that relationship will end. Hence she explained the effort she has been putting into her relationship such as walking a long distance just to see henry. Similarly, wood (2010:293) states that the inequity in investment creates resentment in the person who is assuming the majority of the work to keep the relationship alive. She has been planning all their dates and he often says he is busy and tired. She also told him clearly that it is good if they both equally contribute to responsibilities and expenses. She asked him to actively provide emotional support in their relationship. Henry realized that there have been indeed the imbalances hence he felt guilty. He decided to take more responsibilities in order to maintain their relationship. They both decided to work together to aim at an equitable type of relationship. Their relationship improved and up to now they have a balanced and satisfying relationship.